My first thought is she needs you and you feel stuck/tied down. Second you may be unintentionally closed off emotionally which for me is a protective measure. It’s great that you caught it, and are asking about it! When this happens my life experience is from abandonment, when someone gets too close, I start depending on them, or love deeply. My instinct is to remove them and shut myself off so I prevent pain or problems in the future. My cats are very sensitive to this and help alert me at times that I need to check in, as well as re-evaluate feelings that I could do more for them. Which really isn’t humanly possible, I reaffirm myself, reminding myself of all the great things, love and time I have as well as make an effort daily to give them the best possible life. Check-ins for me means I need to reconnect with them, when she’s on your lap or sleeping in you, close your eyes and do slow deep breaths for 3 min or more, allow yourself to feel her heartbeat, breathing and purring. At 3min studies show that you both release hormones that are pleasure senses. Maybe I’m way off base but it’s what I do that helps, seems silly but it works and allows me to live/love much more deeply.
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